11 March 2005Last night was this year's third all-nighter. Christian and I stayed up all night to study for our math midterm. It was the easiest one to pull so far, and I'm only now starting to feel the tiredness sinking in...I did get about two hours of sleep. Christian only got maybe 40 min though. And now he's playing tennis! Crazy boy.Yesterday I saw a girl holding a leash, and at the end of the leash was the cutest little bunny rabbit, just hopping along! I want a bunny. It was one of the most adorable things ever. I'm about to go out to dinner with my family before fellowship, so that's cool. Haven't seen them in a while. Mae has very good lyrics. It feels like summer...oh the lazy summer days. I'm beginning to adapt to them now...not wanting to do schoolwork, but instead just lounging around and play all day. dreaming aloud at 5:43 PM
08 March 2005who are we to stand before God, stubborn, with our arms crossed, as if to say, "you're really God? prove it. you want a relationship with me? convince me why. what will you give me? what do you have to offer me? make an effort for me and MAYBE i'll believe. maybe i'll follow." we waver, we doubt, we play hard-to-get, we are stubborn and ignorant and don't deserve God's kindness, gentleness, forgiveness, generosity, mercy, grace, persistence. we are supposed to bow down before Him and say, "what do you want of me, Lord? Your wish is my command. i will do anything for You, because You are worthy of all honor, glory, and praise. You have all power, You are holy and awesome and we don't deserve to be in Your presence." we are supposed to give our everything, willingly. why do we resist? why does God put up with us? why doesn't He just give up on us? why does He love us so?because we are His creation, His children. created in His own image. oh, the awe and wonder. the mystery. the greatness of God. why can't i do it? why can't i bow down? dreaming aloud at 3:04 AM
06 March 2005today is a lovely day. even though i have a ton of work to do (lab junk, paper), i've decided that today is going to be simply wonderful. i slept from 8 am to 2:30 pm today, and that was the deepest sleep i've gotten in a long time (even though it was a bit interrupted, but i didn't set the alarm so yay!) so i feel well rested. waiting for the mail is sort of fun too, but i wish it would hurry up and get here. the sun is shining, the windows are open so we have fresh air in our room...i guess i'm just happy because christian is the best. :) he warms my heart. <3 happy four months, sweetheart. :)dreaming aloud at 4:48 PM
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