30 June 2002havent blogged in forever. much to tell. no time.*note to self: post about movie night dinner with mom, no golf with steph :( orch rehearsal (jody and her connections) hike up pt reyes freshmen welcoming church--sunday morn, sunday school ya-ya sisterhood shopping talk with grace will blog later. jes had to blog SOMETHING so y'all knew i was still alive. *grin* dreaming aloud at 11:47 PM
Which Magic Stone are you? by. Xera 
Which Archangel are you? by Xera or 
Which Archangel are you? by Xera 
or  dreaming aloud at 11:45 PM
26 June 2002count ur blessings...Perspectives One day a father and his rich family took his young son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose to show him how poor people can be. They spent a day and a night in the farm of a very poor family. When they got back from their trip the father asked his son, "How was the trip?" "Very good, Dad!" "Did you see how poor people can be?" the father asked. "Yeah!" "And what did you learn?" The son answered, "I saw that we have a dog at home, and they have four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of the garden, they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lamps in the garden, they have the stars. Our patio reaches to the front yard, they have a whole horizon." When the little boy was finishing, his father was speechless. His son added, "Thanks, Dad, for showing me how poor we are!" dreaming aloud at 11:42 PM
this story always makes me cry...or well at least get sniffly: Twenty Dollars A man came home from work late, tired and irritated to find his 5 year old son waiting for him at the door. "Daddy, may I ask you a question?" "Yeah, sure, what is it?" replied the man. "Daddy, how much money do you make in an hour?" "That's none of your business! What makes you ask such a thing?" the man said angrily. "I just want to know. Please tell me, how much money do you make in an hour?" pleaded the little boy. "If you must know, I make $20.00 an hour." "Oh," the little boy replied, head bowed down." Looking up, he asked, "Daddy, may I borrow $10.00, please?" The father was furious. "If the only reason you want to know how much money I make just so you can borrow some money to buy some silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you're being so selfish. I work long, hard hours everyday and I don't have time for such childish games." The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door. The man sat down and started to get even madder about the little boy's questioning. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money. After an hour or so , the man had calmed down, and started to think he may have been a little hard on his son. May be there was something he really needed to buy with that $10.00 and he really didn't ask for money very often. The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door. "Are you asleep son?" he asked "No daddy, I'm awake," replied the boy. "I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier," said the man. "It's been a long day and I took my aggravation out on you. Here's that $10.00 you asked for." The little boy sat straight up, beaming. "Oh, thank you daddy!" he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow, he pulled out some more crumpled up bills. The man, seeing that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, then looked up at the man. "Why did you want more money if you already had some?" the father grumbled. "Because I didn't have enough, but now I do," the little boy replied. "Daddy, I have $20.00 now... Can I buy an hour of your time?" dreaming aloud at 11:33 PM
good story: Graduation Speech (maybe from The Extreme Teen's Heart?) They walked in tandem, each of the ninety-three students filing into the already crowded auditorium. With rich maroon gowns flowing and the traditional caps, they looked almost as grown up as they felt. Dads swallowed hard behind broad smiles, and moms freely brushed away tears. This class would not pray during the commencement--not by choice but because of a recent court ruling that prohibited it. The principal and several students were careful to stay within the guidelines allowed by the ruling. They gave inspirational and challenging speeches, but no one mentioned divine guidance and no one asked for blessings on the graudates or their families. The speeches were nice, but fairly routine. Until the final speech received a standing ovation. A solitary student walked proudly to the microphone. He stood still and silent for just a moment, and then he delivered his speech--a resounding sneeze. The rest of the students rose immediately to their feet, and in unison they said, "God bless you." The audience exploded in applause. This graduating class found a unique way to invoke God's blessings on their future--with or without the court's approval. dreaming aloud at 11:29 PM
i saw the cutest movie today. it was called "model behavior"...a disney channel original movie...i luv those things. i cried a lil during this one...yes i do get emotional during movies...like in spiderman, for instance. we saw that one...sun nite? i kept jumping and getting really scared and covering my eyes...and i cried a lil in that too...but that was such a good movie. *grin* uh oh...movie nite is tmrw...i hope i dont cry TOO much...or get TOO scared...*squirms, blush* o yes. and i went bowling today. that was fun. i didnt do so well, but it was still fun...i luv watching all mi friends bowl! none of us (or almost none of us) really kno how to bowl correctly, so its funnie watching them doing their own lil bowling styles...its so cute!! a new source of entertainment...cheap too! the games on wed's are only $1.25 each...at clayton. woohoo! so everyone...go bowling on wednesdays! dreaming aloud at 11:04 PM
 Strawberry: 50/100 Pear: 20/100 Banana: 10/100 Tomato: 25/100 Lemon: 0/100 Take the What Fruit Are You? test by Ellen and Aaron! mm strawberries...sounds good right about now. random thought...u kno, i never realized how goal-oriented i am...i always need some kind of motivation to do something, some kind of goal or reward to work for and look fwd to... dreaming aloud at 10:36 PM
25 June 2002Wow...think that's enough posts, people? *wink* I'm making up for lost time...Even though most of my posts were stories or quotes I read somewhere and liked... oh well. dreaming aloud at 9:55 PM
Another learning process: A Journey Through Life I've learned... that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life. that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be. that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them. that you can keep going long after you can't. that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. that either you control your attitude or it controls you. that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place. that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences. that money is a lousy way of keeping score. that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time. that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up. that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love. that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated. that your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren't related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren't biological. that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that. that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others, Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself. that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become. that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do. that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change. that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret, It could change your life forever. that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different. that your life can be changed in a matter of minutes, by people who don't even know you. that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help. that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being. that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon. dreaming aloud at 9:50 PM
A promise to all of my true friends: I Will Be There Sometimes the road of life becomes unbearable and it seems easier to give up than to go on. But you should always remember that there is light at the end of the tunnel. For every tear, you will smile; for every rainy day, there will be a rainbow; and for every moment of every day, forever and always there will be someone there to love you and to confide in. I will always be there for you, to carry you over the rocky roads and lead you through the tunnels, to share with you the smiles, the tears, the rainy days and the rainbows. Whenever you need me, I will be there. (something I found and liked *grin* so I "borrowed" it) dreaming aloud at 9:45 PM
Yet another cute story: Special Thoughts Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family. The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion's guest room. Instead the angels were given a small space in the cold basement. As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it. When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied, "Things aren't always what they seem." The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife. After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night's rest. When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field. The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel how could you have let this happen? The first man had everything, yet you helped him, she accused. The second family had little but was willing to share everthing that they had.. "Things aren't always what they seem," the older angel replied. "When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall. Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it." "Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave him the cow instead. Things aren't always what they seem." Sometimes that is exactly what happens when things don't turn out the way they should. If you have faith, you just need to trust that every out come is always to your advantage. You might not know it until some time later... dreaming aloud at 9:29 PM
Another inspiring story: Things I Have Come To Realize... "One of the best things you can do for your life is this: begin again. Begin to forget the baggage you have carried with you for years: the problems that don't matter anymore, the tears that cried themselves away, and the worries that are going to wash away on the shore of tomorrow's new beginning. I have learned that loving someone completely is the most wonderful feeling in the world. TAKE THE RISK. I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them. I've learned that it's not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts. I've learned that writing as well as talking, can ease emotional pains. I've learned that family won't always be there for you. Families aren't biological. I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself. I've learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief. I've learned that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life FOREVER. I've learned that no matter how hard you try to protect your children, they will get eventually get hurt, and you will hurt in the process. I have learned that time really does heal your heart. I have learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become. I have learned that when your children are in another's care, you have to tread lightly. You have no control of their health and safety; they do. I have learned that some people are always dependent on others ... because they choose that. There are always choices. I have learned that some people choose to let life slide by with no motivation. You cannot give other people that desire no matter how hard you try. They have to want it for themselves. I have learned that there are emotional takers and givers in relationships. Givers give life to the takers and the takers take life from the givers. I have learned that you can have absolutely NOTHING material, and it has nothing to do with your happiness. Happiness comes from your soul. I have learned that I have never been so happy being so poor. And you CAN live on love. I have learned that you can get by on charm for about 15 minutes. After that, you'd better know something. I have learned that it's not what happens to people that matters, it's what you do about it. I have learned that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be. I have learned that you can keep going long after you think you can't. I have learned that learning to forgive takes practice. I have learned that working alongside of your mate instead of alone is the most enjoyable feeling -- although very distracting. I have learned that age really does not matter. What matters is the heart. I have learned that my soulmate and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time. I have learned that sex can be just lust, but passion and romance can ignite sensuous desire. I have learned that sometimes when I am angry I have a right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. I have learned that a marriage certificate doesn't guarantee you of anything. Not permanence, not love, and certainly not happiness. I've learned that no matter how much you think something is set in stone, that it's really not. People change. Love changes. And life goes on..." - Jeanette Figueroa dreaming aloud at 9:05 PM
"I want to walk through life instead of being dragged through it." - Alanis Morissette "We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality." - Iris Murdoch, Irish author I went to Barnes & Noble last night with Felicia, and got six new books! I stayed up really late last night reading The Princess Diaries. It was so good, I couldn't put it down! It was different from the movie, but still good. That movie is one of my faves. *grin* Now I want the second book...yes there is a second one. A sequel. Yay! So anyways, now I have my summer reading for...the next couple years. teehee. I still have to read Lord of the Rings and Redwall, among many other things. Today I had to wake up really early to go to...*dundunDUN* a dentist appt. *scrunches nose* It was a cleaning (hygeine) appt...and it hurt! Cuz my teeth are still sensitive from getting my braces off recently. And my gums were too, I guess. Bleh. I went home, watched "The Price is Right" (I luv that show! *grin*) while trying to read two chapters of my atdp hwk, and later fell asleep while reading the chapters. But I got to go out to Jamba Juice/Starbucks with a friend to talk. It was pretty kewl...I'm just a little surprised. And confused. And flustered. Oh well, I'll figure things out. Anyways then I had a violin lesson. Sophia is so cute! I luv her...and she luvs my lil brother...teehee. It's adorable. They were playing together. heehee. There's nothing like being adored by little kids. *grin* Wish I was...hmm...what else happened today...got to talk to Amy online. *grin* She made my day...luv ya chickadee! I have hwk so I think I'll go do that now. I've wasted enough time as it is. Goodbye. dreaming aloud at 8:59 PM
A short story I found inspiring: Life Is "Life isn't about keeping score. It's not about how many friends you have. Or how accepted you are. Not about if you have plans this weekend or if you're alone. It isn't about who you're dating, who you used to date, how many people you've dated, or if you haven't been with anyone at all. It isn't about who you have kissed, it's not about sex. It isn't about who your family is or how much money they have. Or what kind of car you drive. Or where you are sent to school. It's not about how beautiful or ugly you are. Or what clothes you wear, what shoes you have on, or what kind of music you listen to. It's not about if your hair is blonde, red, black, or brown. Or if your skin is too light or too dark. Not about what grades you get, how smart you are, how smart everybody else thinks you are, or how smart standardized tests say you are. It's not about what clubs you're in or how good you are at "your" sport. It's not about representing your whole being on a piece of paper and seeing who will "accept the written you." LIFE JUST ISN'T. But, life is about whom you love and whom you hurt. It's about whom you make happy or unhappy purposefully. It's about keeping or betraying trust. It's about friendship, used as a sanctity or a weapon. It's about what you say and mean, maybe hurtful, maybe heartening. About starting rumors and contributing to petty gossip. It's about what judgments you pass and why. And who your judgments are spread to. It's about whom you've ignored with full control and intention. It's about jealousy, fear, ignorance, and revenge. It's about carrying inner hate and love, letting it grow, and spreading it. But most of all, it's about using your life to touch or poison other people's hearts in such a way that could have never occurred alone. Only you choose the way those hearts are affected, and those choices are what life's all about." - Source Unknown dreaming aloud at 8:30 PM
21 June 2002 You’re Mandy Moore! You’re very sweet and caring. You’re also kind of modest, and shy too. You’re not exactly at the top, but you’re not at the bottom either. Which is alright with you, because you’re not taking life’s gifts for granted. Aw, you’re just the perfect little girl! Polite, gentle, trusting, and have this sickeningly sweet aura that just makes you so darn lovable. But best beware, for your trusting nature can lead to pain as well. What Kind of Pop Princess Are You? Quiz by Jonah  Which movie heroine are you? i went to the golf course today...with kevin and mi daddio. i hung out with kevin the whole time tho, hehe. it was fun, goofin off...i couldnt really concentrate on actually driving correctly...prolly cuz we were rite behind this really really cute guy!! *sigh* he was so dreamy lookin...tall, asian, good skin, tan, muscular, gooood at golf, dressed well, cute hair and eyes...(dunno bout smile cuz we were BEHIND him)...ok i could go on, but u kno...i shouldnt obsess. esp about someone's looks. its jes yummie eye candy...*grin* anyway. rehearsal last nite was sooo hard. i was completely lost. dang i need to practice! btw, that is the most horrid word ever invented. practice. ugh. *shudder* i hate practicing...i think its cuz i have no patience. darn, need to work on that... speaking of no patience, my mom is gettin on my nerves. poop on her. she is gettin on my case for talkin on the phone so much and being online for so long...ok i can understand the online part. but...what about the phone? nothin wrong with that...*sigh* i cant help it if im a chatterbox...ok i'll stop rambling now and get back to practicing violin (or starting heh). more (hopefully interesting) stuff later. dreaming aloud at 8:50 PM
20 June 2002
What kind of ANGEL are you? Quiz made by Angela woohoo!! i'm an angel...and magical!!! even better!! dreaming aloud at 11:56 PM
 I fancy Elves. The only one that will ever look good in tights. Oh yea. Which culture from Middle-Earth do you fancy? By Hannah and Dani ok i had to post this quiz because of...LEGOLAS!! sigh...so dreamy...*grin* dreaming aloud at 11:42 PM
19 June 2002hello. long time no blog. how i have missed thee.well. an update on my life. hmm, where to begin. well, it's summer. and i'm hot and sticky and lazy and don't feel like doing anything, so...here i am. online. again. atdp classes are poopies, too much work. but i get to see heun, so it's all good. *grin* he's a sweetie...when he's not being mean. (*harrumph!*) i luv catchin up with old friends...like heunis...and pan anmeng!!! i want to go to massachusetts to visit her...she says the shopping in boston is to die for...*drool* so, what other tricks and techniques (otherwise known as excuses) has your spyish school taught u? *grin* (btw, isnt her chinese name soo pretty?!?!) o yes, and kevin...i went golfing with him the other day...ok jes to the driving range but still...and we got to talk and catch up and stuff. it was kewl. i luv chillin with friends. hmm i had something to say...now i forgot...o well. i'll post more later, when my brain isn't so mushy. (is that good enuf for ya, mi veggie-luvin friend? and yes, u kno u love those veggies...*grin*) dreaming aloud at 6:06 PM
14 June 2002today was the last day of school. i actually feel kinda sad, cuz i kno that i wont see a bunch of ppl ever again...maybe at school once or twice, but...its not the same. but i am definitely relieved cuz we dont have as much stress and work and stuff. there are definitely pluses. but...i jes kinda miss the people. er, some of them. others, well, i'm glad im far far away from them now...got my grades. still nervous about spanish grade, still borderline. darn. i wish sra holland was here...so i could find out exactly what my grade is. my other grades were ok tho. argh the district is a poopie! no a period classes...whats up with that? not enough money...in debt...psh. they screwed us all over...hmph. NOW what am i gonna do?? i guess drop stat...sigh. maybe its for the better tho, i dont kno if i can handle that many honors classes without collapsing and dropping dead. today was a fun day...besides the morning. blecch. susu and kevin and freesh came over after school, and we went to cpk for lunch with everyone else. i think there was 15 of us. :) that was fun. yum yum. hehe signing yearbooks at the restaurant...o my. so many to sign. and then...shopping!! fun stuff...but the weird thing is, being the shop-a-holic that i am, the only thing that i bought were...books!! yep...thas rite...no clothes...o but i lend my FRIENDS money to buy clothes! grr. didnt find nething that fit me right i guess. plenty of stuff i liked tho...maybe a tad bit too expensive. darn those low-cut dresses...they were so cute on the rack!! um a lil too much skin tho...what's up with these styles nowadays?? jeesh not enough material...what, are they getting stingy on us now?? too cheap to put more material on these clothes? they want the max profit with the min amt of cloth. sigh. jamba juice was good tho...mm peach pleasure. yum. havent had that for a while. (btw the books i got were a wrinkle in time and a walk to remember. note to self: buy "a walk to remember" on dvd!!) hmm...i still smell like gap's so pink...yum i luv this scent. *grin* dropped kevin and freesh off, and went to michaels...got some supplies for my atdp architecture class, and got some canvases and paints and paintbrushes for me!!! yay!!! i was kinda grumpy tho cuz i was so tired...i fell asleep in the car on the way to michaels...hmm we went to oakland tonite...i jes got back a lil while ago...ate yummie food ("real", authentic chinese food! or...taiwanese? not sure...) i am so sleepy tho. my thoughts are getting mixed, jumbled, becoming incomprehendable...so imma go before i start rambling nonsense-ly...or have i already begun? dreaming aloud at 11:40 PM
13 June 2002"it doesn't do to dwell on dreams and forget to live." ~professor dumbledore, "harry potter"hmm...good point...often times i find myself getting caught up in daydreams...and forgetting, i guess, to live... dreaming aloud at 10:40 PM
11 June 2002whew! my hand hurts...cramped from writing so much. well i finally finished my physio outline...now i must memorize. great. and its almost 12...so much for sleeping early...im so proud, last nite i slept before 12, AND i didnt have A per this morn so i got...*drumroll*...seven hours of sleep!!! my new record...woohoo!! hehe yesterday all i pretty much did was talk on the phone...i kinda gave up studying for math...i tried...*shrug* o well...phone was fun. *talktalktalk* i got my yearbook yesterday too, so i was lookin at that...i was so tired when i came home from school yesterday...drained from my three tests. bleh. and i had an ortho appt (got a PURPLE retainer!!) but i fell asleep in the chair...teehee...i was half awake tho...i also fell asleep while waiting for my dentist to seat me...oops. but today, i thought that since we got out early, i could study in the afternoon, go to my brother's baseball game, and come back and study some more, and sleep early...but...NOOO...i watch tv all afternoon..."studying" while watching...and go to my brother's game, which lasted for almost 3 hrs (instead of the 2 i thot it would be)...it was their semi-finals, and they won, 22 - 2!!! their best ever! again...he's such a good pitcher! the best in the whole AA league. *grin* i'm so proud...anyway, so it wasnt the short game i thot it would be. so i ended up finishing my physio outline a lil while ago. (thank u so much freesh!! ur outline totally helped me) anyway my lil break from physio is almost over...i should get back to studying...and memorizing...and recopying...muscle memory, right? blah...i'll be glad when this week is OVER! i do like the short days tho. *grin* btw girls...are we doing something on friday? lunch...broadway plaza...shopping?? heehee...or...wait...freesh, do we hafta get together with the guys to work on the parent appreciation poem? dreaming aloud at 11:42 PM
10 June 2002knight: ohhh! now i understand (somewhat) what u meant by love causing both joy and pain, both healing and suffering. (i jes read ur blog) hmm...much to think about...well this is my short break from studying. even tho i havent studied much. i cant concentrate. my mind keeps wandering. and all i want to do is sleep. unfortunately, i cannot, so back to studying i go. dreaming aloud at 10:44 PM
If you sleep in a cold room, you are more likely to have a bad dream. Pigs can run a mile in 7 ½ minutes. Jack is the most common name in a fairy tale. The word abracadabra comes from a Hebrew phrase, "Father, Son, and Holy Spirit". Aba (the father), Ben (the son) and Acadsch (the holy spirit). (I know it doesn't make much sense, a Christian phrase said in Hebrew, but that's how it happened.) The short phrases of organ music played at a baseball game is called a tucket. Tuckets were originally a trumpet fanfare, used to anounce royalty. (So people would have time to compose themselves) Dungarees is another word for Denim Sesquipedalian is a word used to describe long words. Another name for the card game "Solitaire" is "Patience". The best beaches for surfing face west. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. Only 6% of animal testing is for medical purposes. Nervous people like crunchy food The British royal family uses rose petals as confetti. more random facts dreaming aloud at 12:14 AM
09 June 2002takin a break from physio. shoot. i jes started studying for finals. im such a lazy procrastinator. i mean, i KNOW i have work to do and studying to do...but i still sit around and go online and watch tv and jes bum around. im so exhausted tho. physically, mentally, spiritually. i need to be renewed, my spirit refreshed. i need a place of peace and comfort and sanity and quiet and reflection. why is this world so cruel, cold, harsh, gut-wrenching, heart-breaking? i cant bear to live another moment of my life. i have so many hopes, so many dreams, so many things i want to do, learn, places to go and visit. but i cant. i think i have lost hope. i am miserably alone. o sure, i can put up a face and pretend everything is fine. even that doesnt work, people can see right thru that disguise. or can they? sometimes i dont think people actually see me. they dont notice me. i'm invisible. but...i dont want to lose hope! i dont want to lose the only thing that keeps my life together...my faith. i reach my hand out, there is nobody there. where do i go? who do i turn to? who will see me for who i really am, who will hear my cries for help? im sinking, being pulled under by waves of depression and sadness that roll over me. i feel so empty and lost. what happened? why do i let little meaningless things get to me, bother me so much? i feel so confused. being pulled in so many directions. my heart and my head dont kno which to follow. fragmented...separated...detached. unfeeling...numb. no more. please. no more.dreaming aloud at 10:06 PM
07 June 2002today pretty much sucked. blah day. i had a headache the whole day, and felt lightheaded and queasy. dunno why. it was even before physio, with the fetal pigs! so...hmm...dunno whats wrong with me. plus i didnt make it into dp. im not surprised tho. i expected that. ooh...lunch was good tho...got to watch jazz band perform. *sigh* they're so good! *grin* i wish i could be in jazz band. unfortunately i dont play an instrument. :( or, well, not a jazz instrument. mm...eye candy...*grin*mr gemkow is awesome! we dont have an eng final...instead we get a party...and the last couple days we've been pretending to "work" outside, heehee. fun stuff. he played guitar for us today...but he didnt play much cuz he let some students play. poop on them. i wanted to hear mr gemkow. lessee...i went to my lil bro's baseball game today. they won, so they get to go to the playoffs! :) im so proud...he's so good at pitching!!! :) he pitched the last two innings, and got the other team out really fast. short innings... well im wasting too much precious time online, so i will be on my way now...farewell. dreaming aloud at 9:29 PM
i wish to fly...  'What kind of Wing are you?' by. Xera lookie!! fairie wings!!!!! *grin* woohoo!  which Episode II character are you? Queen of Naboo. You could have a split personality - simply to hide who you really are. You are extremely polite and gentle. However, if needs be, you will take action and can be a very good leader. You have the power to make people believe in you - use this power. The one you love could also end up being the one you hate. heehee...naboo... 
Take the "Which Flower are you?"quiz by Hazel or 
Take the "Which Flower are you?"quiz by Hazel 
I’m the tiny little penguin with the major attitude! I live in Austraila, New Zealand, and other sub-artic areas near by. I’m the smallest penguin of them all, but to be honest, I’m not really over-hunted by predators or humans. Currently humans aren’t harming me!
dreaming aloud at 8:52 PM
06 June 2002dp auditions were today. they were fun, actually. it was interesting, watching everyone perform. and everyone is really supportive of each other, so its not such a competitive, tense, stressful environment. so even tho i kinda messed up my auditions, it was still fun. and now i have an idea of what its like, so when i try out next year, i'll know what to expect...and kno that i hafta prepare way ahead of time!! :)hmm...i guess i dont have much to say, or any updates to give on my oh-so-interesting life. nothings really changed i guess...except that i ate with my girlfriends today at lunch. the ones in the lockers. so that was pretty kewl. i guess i havent really eaten with them for a while. it kinda felt weird...but whatever. im kinda hungry...*grumble grumble* and its so late already...should i go eat? i guess i should obey the commands of my tummie...off to eat i go! (wow this is such a bad habit of mine...weird eating times make me more and more plump...unhealthy too. blecch.) dreaming aloud at 11:21 PM
05 June 2002 Which Sanrio character are you? by  woofiegrrlhmm...this fits me? weird...i mean i love pochacco...cuz he's cute and wears purple...but...the description doesnt seem like me...does it? u tell me...  which Cruel Intentions character are you?created by switchico Annette Hargrove - You are daddy's perfect daughter. You are the girl-next-door that guys would want to bring home to their moms. You are sweet and you are pure. You are willing to wait for the right guy. Just don't turn your back on him when he shows up. You have the tendency to become the next Kathryn so be careful. dreaming aloud at 11:00 PM
ok nvm...im back. adding to my rant...i hate how hormones make it hard to talk to certain people...why do things hafta be all weird?! argh...i hate being curious...i mean i dont hate it, but i gots to kno when to NOT be curious...cuz sometimes i find out things i dont need to know...and that messes up everything and causes me a lot of stress and worries. not fun stuff. let me scream...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! *pulls at hair and does mad stomping dance* grr. i hate it when u want to write something meaningful and inspirational, or at least accurately describing whatever it is ur writing about, and...u cant!! there are no words to describe what im feeling...no reasons why, no explanations...nothing is coming to me. just a blank piece of paper...words jumbled in my head, emotions and heavy weights tangled in my heart... dreaming aloud at 9:26 PM
hmph...you know what else i cant stand? other people's moodiness and weird emotions...now i kno how i must look to other people...when i'm moody and emotional. sigh. its not pretty. and dang can people be dramatic or what?! and u kno...i cant take all these emotional hormones runnin around everywhere either...its not too fun. why do we complicate things so often?? well that was my lil rant of the day. im done. for now. dreaming aloud at 8:56 PM
i almost cried in physio...i had to blink back tears...but today was a lot better than monday. it's still really hard for me to watch people dissecting the pigs tho. it seems so cruel...and the pigs seem so helpless and tortured, when i think about it. i guess i dont kno if it hurts them or not when they die...but it still seems cruel. i can dissect parts of things, like organs and such, but not whole animals...as mrs b says, i get too emotionally involved...how pathetic of me. i didnt even kno the pig. but mrs b was really nice about it today. she was being understanding and stuff, when i told her i couldnt dissect the pig...she said for me to just try and watch...and she was saying a lot of nice stuff to me today. *grin* it's weird how a teacher can make you happy sometimes...usually they jes get me frustrated and annoyed. yesterday in english we got to visit ms. moore's class and listen to a guest speaker, a slam poet named Aaron Gardner. he was awesome! i love poetry, so hearing and seeing him perfom was a total treat. :) and him being kinda cute and a good dresser didn't hurt either...*grin* i want to go see slam poets perform, but unfortunately they perfom in bars usually, or places similar to bars...and so i prolly couldn't get in cuz im underage. darn. well, when im older...college! :) another reason to look fwd to college... bah...i am a horrible friend...i'm so moody and poopie. impatient. annoyed easily. i dont kno why, but everyone gets on my nerves...why?! and i feel like i dont belong anywhere...like with friends. i feel like i dont kno who my close friends are anymore, i dont kno who i can trust. i dont kno why i feel this way. its weird...i'm weird...ehh whatever. blah. don wanna think about guy trauma either. poopie guys. u gotta love em, but dang are they trouble...whats weird is that i sometimes feel like i can get along better with guys than girls...but then if thats the case, why do they cause me so much trouble? i dont get it...more mysteries of life, yet to be solved...the secrets are yet to be revealed to me...i eagerly await that day. well, i must get back to studying...just took a short break to keep me halfway sane. feet and other various muscles are sore from dancing so much lately...aaah its so nervewracking too! and it requires so much energy and concentration and focus to remember how to do the moves, and put your own style into them, and make them look good, and etc. blah. all those little details. its very difficult...imma die tmrw. (auditions are tmrw) o well...i kno im not gonna make it...so i'll try out next yr too. more details to come. dreaming aloud at 8:38 PM
have you ever talked to "SmarterChild" on aim? its pretty interesting... quiz results from the sn "SmarterChild": You Are a Cool Chick You can hold your own partying with your male buddies, but you don't feel the need to crush an empty beer can on your forehead. You have managed to achieve the balance between maintaining your femininity and still being able to let your hair down. You value your friendships with both men and women and recognize the unique qualities each has to offer. You Are a Level Lioness People are drawn to you because of your inviting warmth. People often describe you as lucky, but the secret to your many successes is being able to pursue your goals in a confident, but never abrasive manner. You have managed to achieve an important sense of balance. You are able to politely, but firmly, set limits when necessary. Bravo! dreaming aloud at 8:25 PM
03 June 2002aaaah! i thought i fixed ur problem, mr knight...what happened?! its back...the #'s and archives and everything...ugh. no, fairies dont kno everything. not this one. (as u can see from what happened to ur blog...) im sorrie u have so much work to do...but ur not alone. i should be writing my english essay...but im drawing a blank...all i can think of are dance steps and my head is spinning...literally. mi head is swimming with all these thoughts, random thoughts, from who likes who to what hwk i hafta do to what dance moves i hafta remember...aiya. well back to work i go...*deep breath* remember, ina, take things one at a time...slow down...and breathe! sleeping is optional...*wink*dreaming aloud at 9:35 PM
i'm so incredibly tired. the dp dance (clinic dance) is so hard! well, its jes fast. u hafta learn incredibly fast. stupi dbl pierouettes. and axle. grr. i dont kno if i can catch on that quick AND make it look good. i can get the moves...but i look stupid doing them. ehh. i need to have more "confidence" and energy. anyways i worked on my solo dance today with liz. i have about a min of it made up. gots to work on it tho...i only kno half of it. blah. darn those fetal pig dissections. i almost fainted today. i got so queasy jes smelling them...and then actually seeing people cutting them open...was torture for me. and she expects me to take the practical (and study for it) w/o barfing?! i dont think so...i cant do this. oi vey...there are too many things all jumbled up in my head...my head feels like its gonna explode...i cant take this anymore. i need a good cry...i'll be back later, with dry eyes... dreaming aloud at 7:47 PM
things to do over summer: orchestra (and get paid! *grin*) learn viola take jazz class (dance) yg leadership write poetry and short story paint (acrylics)--buy canvases and paintbrushes dreaming aloud at 7:41 PM
01 June 2002ooh yay...im proud...i got mi links to make a lil wave...well anyway i think its cute! (check out the links on the side of mi blog) yea...jes so u guys kno, i love u all dearly and ur blogs or sites arent in any specific order...theyre jes on there to make the lil wave. *grin* yes this is how i amuse myself...making my blog look all pretty...teehee.woohoo...mr. knight has made a blog...welcome to the uhh...club? of kewl ppl. haha. or maybe...writers? poets? iono...umm i dont kno how much i can help u...cuz as u can see...i dont have much on MY blog...which i still hafta update and tamper with the template and all that good stuff. dang u posted a TON of stuff!!! hmm...someone was bored today! and had a lot of time on his hands...*wink* good stuff tho. good stuff. its real cute... well...this week has certainly been...eventful. busy. full of joy. but full of sadness too. i think my friend's mad at me...*hangs head* what did i do?? too many things on my mind right now. i am very confused. so overwhelmed. i think i'll go write a poem...later...when i have time. (yea i'll let u see some of mi poems, fellow poet...mr knight. maybe. if im not too embarrassed to show them to u...*blush*) gnite everyone! (*gasp* yes, make a note...ian IS going to bed early!!! this is one exhausted fairie...*yawn*) dreaming aloud at 10:52 PM
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